Boys... I am learning many things as I progress on this wonderful journey called mothering. I am learning that the forrest really does overtake the view sometimes. I am so wrapped up in the parts of my day, how they "should" be and the schedule....I forget to take the proper time to hug, inspire, create and just be. My son is loud, rambunctious, thoughtful, funny and so much more.

I heard it once said "live life with reckless abandon". I have always sided with a bit of caution. I am not one who can easily remove myself completely and just let go. Maybe it is a "female" thing, an "older and wiser" thing, maybe it is just my "nature"; whatever it is.... I wish that I could just let go and see the wonder in thoughtlessness of childhood make believe. Maybe I can be a Jedi, a Knight or even a Quaterback.  I need to take heed from my son and play hard because for today, it means everything to him. It might make a difference in what I classify as Chaos....

Today, I celebrate the birth of my sweet little girl! I am so proud of her. Happy 4th Birthday!!!
She is strong willed, loving, kind and smart as a whip! I sometimes forget that this is a job that I have chosen. She test my every reserve some days and then on others asks "Mommy do you need a snuggle?" She loves school and I hope for her that the love of learning never leaves her. I love that she can play in her imaginary world for a few hours and still retain the wonder of it all. I miss that part of being a kid; I think I have forgotten how to play. She causes the Chaos and helps me put it all in perspective. Most of all this says what I can not:

All my love to you, Fi! You have changed my life. Love, Mommy

A new year...another beginning.

It seems that I have a problem...... this is me on a not so glamorous day (if I ever had one). Yes, I am the one in the middle. The two ladies on my sides: best friends since High School. I have always been a bit curvier than them but not LARGER. I have made two resolutions this year......to be healthier and kinder to myself. This included going cold turkey on New Years day with smoking and joining Weight Watchers the very next day! It will be tough but I do not want to be the parent that passes on poor habits because I am too lazy to change them.

I am not posting this for all the wrong reasons of look at me but more so to say....I really need help in accomplishing these goals. I have more than 50 pounds to loose and would like to kick the smokey treat habit forever!

So if you happen to read this post and continue to check in....I will post my strides as I make them (good and bad). We are all human and can use a little kindness and courage. So here I am asking for support from the world. Help me harness the Chaos!